A Mother's Hug

Since having moved back to Suffolk I am experiencing a rather strange relationship change with my Mother!

This is almost the third time it has happened in the last couple of years since my Father died. At first it was whilst my Father was in hospital and my Mother said to me one day, after I used to pop into the family home to do the odd job, "gosh, you really are lovely".....and to most, that may not be so strange, but to me, that was the first nice thing my Mother had said to me in years. Perhaps then she knew that our relationship needed to actually become a "relationship" as it was becoming more obvious as each day passed that my Father was very ill and going to pass away.

The second time this occurred was when my Mother realised that actually for whatever reason, I never brought up how bad a Mother she had been whilst my siblings and I were growing up, or say anything derogatory to her, this all when my Father had died, and she saw me as someone that she could rely upon. I would rush back to Suffolk to ensure all was ok and that she had someone to help with what even at times may seem small jobs....I was then seen in a new light as far as my Mother was concerned, I was now a convenience for her!

However, this third change is the most alarming! Last week, my Mother picked me up from her local train station in Manningtree on my return from work.....took me to her house, fed me supper and drove me to my flat where we enjoyed a coffee together. My Mother had also not seen my new residence until now. We sat side by side on the settee and from nowhere she moved closer towards me and put her arm round me and stroked the top of my arm! Rather than actually being drawn in, i was in a total mix of emotions, in one sense i wanted to let go and have a good cry about so many things, in another i was in shock from this maternal instinct and the other was just so bewildered by the whole experience i felt rather numb!

However, now I look back, i am absolutely thrilled by the whole experience. My Mother really can be a "Mummy" when she wants to be! I should have sat back, relaxed and enjoyed the gesture more....let's see if this ever happens again......